Slim Chance
by Mardia
Summary: Michael's POV. Michael thinks about the fact that Mia's a princess. Spoliers for the first book.


Slim Chance 

Summary: Michael's POV. Michael's thoughts about when he found out that Mia was a princess. 

Disclaimer: The Princess Diaries, Mia, Lilly, and Michael all belong to Meg Cabot. I own nothing, I'm just borrowing them for a little while. 

Spoliers: The Princess Diaries, Volume One. 

A princess. 

A freaking _princess_. 

Just when was she going to tell us? Not even _Lilly_ knew about this, and she's known Mia forever. 

She's pretty hacked off, too. All this time, Mia's had this huge secret that she hasn't known about. They've known each other since first grade, and Mia's evidently been keeping a huge thing from her all this time. 

Okay, we knew her father had money. I mean, the girl goes off every summer to stay with her father and grandmother at their place in France. 

That's right, people. _France._ Obviously, the man has got some serious cash. 

Actually, his personal worth is about three hundred million. 

Good God. I'm head-over-heels in love with a girl whose's father is worth about three hundred million dollars.

How did I find out, you ask? Mia's picture was in the _New York Post_. Yes, people, Mia Thermopolis, the girl I used to tease, annoy,  and am right now tutoring in algebra and am absolutely crazy about, has her picture on the _front page_ of the _New York Post _with the headline: _Princess Amelia: New York's Very Own Royal_. 

The entire school knows too. Lana _Whine_burger and her snotty friends are freaking out about it and trying to get on TV. I didn't find out until after I was about ready to leave for school and my dad runs out of his bedroom, yelling and waving the Post in his hands. 

Needless to say, I was pretty shocked. 

Not as shocked as Lilly though. The girl stood there for ten minutes after Dad told us the news stammering, "But-but-but-"

Mia was sent to Principal Gupta's office soon after she got to school. After she came out, she had this huge, blond guy trailing her around. 

He's her bodyguard, I guess. Wow. The guy's got a gun, too. I saw it eariler. 

This is how our conversation in G & T went.

_Mia: Hi, Michael, I did all those problems you gave me. But I still don't see why you couldn't just look at the train schedule to find out what time a train traveling at 67 miles per hour will arrive in Farge, North Dakota, if it leaves Salt Lake City at 7 A.M._

_Me: So. Princess of Genovia, huh? Were you ever going to share that little piece of info with the group, or were we all supposed to guess?_

_Mia: I was kind of hoping no one would find out._

_Me: Well, that's obvious. I don't see why, though. It's not like it's a bad thing. _

_Mia: Are you kidding me? Of course it's bad!_

I guess she's worried about living up to her family's standards. Genovia has the highest literacy rate in Europe, some of the best educational attainment rates and the lowest infant mortality, inflation, and unemployment rates in the Western Hemisphere. 

Maybe Mia's father should consider becoming President of the United States of America. 

I'm serious. Supposedly, we're like the most powerful country in the world, but do we have the lowest infant mortality, inflation, and unemployment rates in the Western Hemisphere? Nope.

That's got to be a lot to live up too. Plus, the girl has to have an armed escort around all the time to protect her from terrorists, kidnappers, _and_ the crowd of reporters that have been camped outside the school. 

But, of course, my darling sister just _had_ to make her opinion known, even though neither of us were talking to her. 

_Lilly: So you're not aware that the crown prince of Genovia-namely, your father-has a total personal worth which, including real estate property and the palace's art collection, is estimated at over three hundred million dollars?_

_Mia: Um…_

Lilly: I wonder how much of that fortune was amassed by taking advantage of the sweat of the common laborer.

For the love of God, just because Mia cut her hair without consulting her and said shut up-(and in my opinion, she should have done it years ago!)-Lilly decides to consider her Public Enemy Number One. 

Of course, I, being crazy about Mia and not too crazy about Lilly at that point, had to step in.

Me: Considering that the people of Genovia have traditionally never paid income or property taxes, I would say none of it. What is with you, anyway, Lil?

At this point, this conversation turns into full-scale war. 

Lilly: Gosh, Michael, you sure are quick to come to Mia's defense all of a sudden. I wonder if maybe it ever occurred to you that your argument, while ostensibly based on logic, might have less intellectual than libidinous roots. 

It's official. When my sister gets pissed off, she can turn into a full-on bitch. 

_Me: (turning red at this point) Well, what about your persecution of the Hos? Is that rooted in intellectual reasoning? Or is it more an example of vanity run amok?_

_Lilly: That's a circular argument._

_Me: It isn't. It's empirical._

After that, I asked Mia if her bodyguard would follow her to the Cultural Diversity Dance, and she said that that hadn't been an issue, since no one had asked her. 

Good. 

Or not so good. I mean, I have plently of reasons why I won't tell Mia how I feel. (And it's not just because I'm a coward.)

One: She my sister's best friend. (Or she was, so maybe this should be taken off the list.)

Two: She might not feel the same way I do. (Every guy on the planet lives in pathological fear of being laughed at by the girl they're asking out.)

Three: She's a freshman, I'm a senior.

Four: We might mess up our friendship.

Five: If we break up, I might still have to see her all the time, 'cause she's my sister's best friend. (Or maybe not.)

Now I've got another reason to add to my list after today. And it's the biggest one of all.

I might have a chance with Mia Thermopolis. I mean, sometimes I walk around our apartment without a shirt on when Mia's not around and I have definitely noticed her checking me out once or twice. (Yes, I do occasionally do this on purpose. So sue me.) Maybe not _that_ great a chance, but still, I've got a shot.

But what shot do I have with Amelia Mignonette Grimaldi Thermopolis Renaldo, Princess of Genovia? 


End file.
